How To Convince Parents For Love Marriage Without Hurting Them And 12 Ways to convince your parents for love marriage without offending them
A lot of kids still marry according to the wishes of their elders in India. Whether you have recently met someone or you are passionately in love, you may wish to step away from convention and tie the knot with them. This write-up shall aid your quest by helping you to earn your parents’ blessing. So, take a look at some of the things you can do to convince your parents for love marriage without hurting them.
You are in love with your partner because of all the attributes they have. However, your parents do not know them at all. Change this, by helping them realise why this individual is the ideal life partner for you. Showcase their best qualities right from their nature, cooking skills, emotional intelligence or financial stability; these may help convince your parents.
It is often the case that parents wish to make all your big decisions for you. It is mainly because they assume you are young and yet unable to take strong decisions and live with the consequences that come with them. Hence, you must prove to your parents that you’re capable of making mature decisions by offering examples of how you’ve done so in the past. This could be anything from choosing your own career path and succeeding in it or living alone in a new city for education and pulling it off without their help.
What To Do If Parents Are Against Love Marriage?
Eventually, if you’re that crazy in love and a little bit of a rebel, you might choose to take a stand for your relationship, especially if you find your parents not agreeing to it. You may decide that you want to go ahead with your relationship and get married to the love of your life despite your parents not being on board with it.
We don’t blame you at all. In fact, we are in no place to judge you. If you’re scared of the consequences but have made up your mind to marry the love of your life, here’s what to do if parents are against love marriage
1. Be sure of what you want from your relationship
How to convince parents for love marriage? First and foremost, believe in your relationship yourself. Before you make an attempt to talk to your parents about your relationship or want to convince parents for intercaste marriage, it is essential that you assess your relationship honestly and are convinced about it too.
Be sure of what you want from the relationship and whether you both are ready for commitment or not. If even one of you is commitment-phobic, it will ruin everything at the last minute and all your effort will be in vain. Without being sure of the relationship yourself, you will fail to convince your parents of your love marriage. When it comes to inter-caste relationships, be sure you’re armed with logic and can dispel their casteist words and ‘traditions’ with calm knowledge.
2. Let your parents know that you have someone in your life
Either directly or indirectly, through subtle hints, you must let your parents know that there is someone special in your life. Let them know you have a partner and that it’s not a fling. Do not commit the mistake of keeping your relationship hidden because if you do so, it will hurt your parents later.
As it is, Indian parents assume that their kids can never fall in love on their own. Introducing your partner to your parents is never easy. You need to show them respect and trust by sharing your feelings with them. Along with that, if you hide your relationship, it might indicate that you are also not sure about your choice.
https://dai.ly/x8fa3uy3. Share your views with your parents regarding marriage
You must make it a point to share your views about marriage with your parents. Your parents might be against an inter-caste marriage or a love marriage but let them know what matters to you the most when it comes to choosing a partner, like their educational qualification, character, and so on and so forth. Also, let them know about the things that do not bother you at all, like the age difference, caste, economic status, etc.
A debate may surface. Actually, in most cases, it will. It will allow you to see how rigid or flexible they are. But remember that you and your parents can come to an amicable consensus. With parents not agreeing to marriage, the road is going to be tough. But the more you rationalize your choice, the better it will be. This way, they will know what you want and perhaps will be more open to the possibility of a love marriage.
4. Show your parents that you are responsible and mature
This is the most important chapter in the “How to convince your parents for love marriage?” handbook. Always act in a responsible and mature manner so that your parents can trust your decision-making ability. For example, take a lead in solving any problems facing the family, or try to lend a helping hand to your parents as and when required.
Make sure your parents know that you are ready to take on life’s challenges and are not someone who would back off in the face of difficult times. No one would trust the judgment of someone who appears immature and irresponsible. The more responsible you seem, the more brownie points you get. The more brownie points you have, the easier it will be to convince strict parents for love marriage.
5. Listen to your parents’ perspectives as well
Parents not agreeing to marriage can seem unfair, we know. Despite that, it is important that you try your best to respect their opinion in the process. As irksome as it may be, hear them out. Your parents might disapprove of your marriage but it is really important that you listen to your parents’ perspective and the concerns they have regarding your love marriage.
Perhaps it is the inter-caste factor , or perhaps they are not sure of your prospective partner’s intentions. Remember that without knowing what they are actually thinking, you will not be able to deal with the issues effectively. They may have varying reactions to your news and you must be prepared for that. Don’t lash out and do NOT make things worse. Remember to not get defensive but assert your position in a clear and respectful manner.
6. Make your parents see the best in your partner
Indulging in a love marriage with a huge age difference? Even though major age-gap relationships are growing more and more common these days, not all Indian parents are okay with their son marrying a woman 12 years older than him. But to reverse this ideology, you need to just put your foot down and ask for what you want. You need to show them what you love so much about the person you want to marry. Talk about their ageist views as well, gently, and get to the bottom of their biases if you can.
Talk to your parents and let them know why your partner is the perfect life partner for you. Highlight the good qualities of your partner in front of your parents as and when possible. Make sure that when you do that, you talk about those positives which interest your parents. This will help you convince your parents about your love marriage. Talk about how career-oriented they are, how they have a bunch of hobbies, or a great family who readily accepts you. Blow up the positives in front of them as much as you can.
You can even propose a meeting between your partner and your parents so that they can meet your partner and get rid of their doubts. For this, if you can coach your partner about the good and the bad about your family, they may be able to put their best foot forward confidently.
7. Take the help of close friends and relatives to convince strict rigid parents for love marriage
Those relatives and friends who are in favor of love marriages can help you convince your parents too. So use them to your advantage, and use them well. This trick will work wonders if someone from your family has had a love marriage and is leading a happy married life. You can take your cues from them, plus you can also talk about them to your parents generally to get an idea of what they think of the whole episode.
An example of successful love marriage in your family itself will help you make your point more confidently and make your strict parents feel more receptive to the whole idea.
8. Do not make any rash decisions
When it comes to matters of love, you might not be able to take decisions rationally as you are bound by feelings – and lots of them. But to convince your parents, that kind of attitude will get you nowhere. If you want to seriously convince strict parents to love marriage, you must put in more effort to change your ways a little. You need to have patience and maintain your sanity at all times.
When you notice that your parents disapprove of your partner, you might be tempted to leave your house or marry your partner without their approval. You feel misunderstood as your parents stubbornly refuse to see the benefits of a love marriage. To prove them wrong, you may take such extreme steps and lash out.
9. Try to get the support of at least one parent
Love marriage with age difference or having to convince parents for inter-caste marriage, whatever it may be, you need at least one parent on your side. If you’re closer to one of your parents, invest more effort into convincing that parent first because deep down, they love and understand you far more than the other.
After convincing the parent who is close to you, half the battle will be won. Then you can take that parent’s help to talk to your other parent. But make sure this does not create barriers between your mother and father.
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10. Turn down any suggestions of meeting someone else
Your parents will do everything they can to pressurize you to meet someone else and forget about your partner. From matrimonial sites to ambushing you with prospective matches, they are going to fight tooth and nail for you to get over the love of your life. But you have to be loyal to your partner and turn down any suggestions of meeting someone else. Be persistent so that your parents realize that you truly love your partner.
11. Make arrangements for the meeting of both families
Once they realize that you are in no mood to budge, it is time to finally take things a step ahead. When you have done enough to make your parents feel a little comfortable with the idea of love marriage and your partner, you can convince them to meet the parents of your partner. This will help them resolve any issues and doubts they have about the family background, socio-economic status, culture, values, morals, or other things about your partner that they may be apprehensive about.
12. Keep fighting and do not give up
How to convince parents for love marriage? By absolutely not giving in to them. If you truly love your partner and want to spend the rest of your life with them, then you have to keep fighting for your love. Despite the obstacles your parents create, you have to remain dedicated to your love and not give up at any cost. Sounds rough, we know, but this was never going to be easy.
